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Episode 232: Compartmentalize Time for Life Balance During Divorce

Compartmentalize Time for Life Balance During Divorce

In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
1. People feel out of control during divorce. (Expand)

2. People need to know how to incorporate the work that is required of them in the filing process, and in the decision-making process. Compartmentalizing time is the way to deal with divorce IF you absolutely have to work. 
 a. If you have the luxury of not having to work, then make divorce your job and focus your attention on getting everything necessary for the divorce to move forward expeditiously.  b. Yelling

3. We are a culture that supports and glorifies multi-tasking. Multi-tasking divorce into daily routines will make you sick and potentially cause severe illness. Multi-tasking is the last behavior that should be accepted. Separating everything necessary to deal with the legal side of divorce properly, with a clear mind and a calm heart is the only way to properly address the process of divorce. 

4. Choose divorce professionals who understand and support the separation of your daily lives from your divorce life. Here’s what I mean…Look at the time you have available outside of your jobs and outside of the schedules for your children for you to complete paperwork, go to mediations, engage in depositions, go to Hearings and Depositions, and any other meetings necessary for the divorce to move forward, and schedule those free times and/or personal days from work, to focus on the divorce. The operative word being focus. Good divorce decisions require nothing less than focus; focus of the mind, of the heart, and of the emotions. When we try and multi-task the divorce stuff into our regular daily stuff, we cannot give divorce stuff the correct focus and attention that it needs to be lasting and appropriate for your lives, especially once the divorce is final. People experience decision-makers remorse because their decisions were made too hastily.

5. Put a schedule together that allows you to work without interruption, that gives you valuable time with your children and all of the activities in their lives, and that provides for exercise and alone time. Look at the remaining time and that’s what you assign for divorce work. Then share that schedule with your divorce professionals, and stick to it. Return emails, phone calls, and paperwork in the time assigned for divorce.  

6. The only fly in the ointment of your well-crafted schedule will be Hearings, Depositions, a few meetings with those filing for you, and Mediations, The court isn’t opened on weekends, so personal time from work will have to be taken. If you share that you’re going through a divorce with either your Human Resources department, or your manager/business owner, you both can work together to craft a schedule that allows for work to continue and for your schedule to have flexibility.

7. Lastly, do not respond to angry texts and emails from your spouse during work or family time. That can be done within your divorce time. Nothing will disrupt your day more than mean emails and texts. Control this shit. Do not succumb to disruptive communication. Put it in its place! Your divorce time slot. Everything, as much as possible, goes there.  

Compartmentalizing Time will give you a better life quality during divorce, and you will have developed a skill that can be used in any conflict. Part of this is Mindfulness, and part of this is simply scheduling. Have the confidence and the courage to take charge of your time. 
Judith M. Weigle has been a divorce mediator and document preparation service for 11 years as President of Divorce Resource, Inc. in Los Angeles. In that time she has seen people approach divorce in various ways, and has developed the Recipe for a Heart-Healthy Divorce, a four-step strategy to an amicable and productive divorce. Judith has aggregated the four essential steps that she has learned not only from her clients, but from the learned experts on her podcast to provide a successful formula for the best divorce possible. 
www.Divorce ResourceInc.com 
LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/judith-m-weigle-65b1268/
IG @TheAmicableDivorceExpert
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/JudithMWeigle  


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